Today I joined AzPA, which is the Arizona Psychological Association. I also decided to start taking part in a lab for my entire senior year. Taking part in these activities while being in school is one of the most beneficial things I can be doing with my life at this current time. I am attempting to take advantage of anything and everything that comes my way and will better my future. I still have dreams, even though I have accomplished so many of them. It often feels as if I don’t have enough time to do all of the things I want to do. I am almost 25 years old, which mean that I have been alive for almost a quarter century and that I spent a little over a quarter of my life wasting my time with drugs and crime. The next part of my life is not dedicated to making up for my past mistakes, but instead making new mistakes and learning from those. The difference is that the mistakes I will make are simply that: mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes and it is those who learn from their mistakes that flourish in life. I plan on learning from all of the mistakes I will make in the future, because I have already learned so much from my past mistakes and even the more recent ones I have made. This is what also plays a vital role in my moving up in the world, because I am not allowing myself to stay stagnant in one position for any lengthy period of time. As I said earlier there are too many things to do and experience and it seems as if there is just not enough time to do it all. I am getting older and wiser, yet stressing out over life even more. It is as if I am having a quarter century crisis. Lately I have been thinking about how badly I want kids and how tough it is to realize that I can’t afford to have kids right now and I don’t have the time to be the loving mother I will one day be. I am being hit from every corner about my future and what I am doing with my life. How do I manage to stay sane half of the time? The only answer I have to that question is that I do my very best at living every day one day at a time and not focusing on my past or too much on my future. Life is often quite complex, yet at other times it is so simple. The ever changing existence I have will cease to amaze me.

I asked my co-workers what I should write about, and someone yelled out "Pizza!" So here I am, unsure what exactly it is I should be blogging to my friends out there in the real world, talking about pizza.

My favorite kind of pizza is definitely mushroom thin-crust pizza, even though I hardly ever treat myself to such splendid Italian cuisine. Not too long ago, my friends Billy, Natalie, Jeff and I went to Oreganos Restaurant to eat out and talk about relationships ¡V something we do on a weekly basis. We toss around all of our preconceived ideas about boys and girls, love and break-ups, values and families in today's society.

When the waitress came to our table, I expected everyone to order as they normally did. I suspected that Natalie would order a Meatball Sandwich, Jeff would order his Classic Calzone, and Billy would order a thick-crust Hawaiian pizza. Usually, I indulge in a Cesar salad, but I ordered first, and asked for a slice of mushroom pizza. And then, so did Natalie...and so did Billy... and to our surprise, so did Jeff.

The waitress looked puzzled as she wrote down our order. ¡§Would you all just like to share one pizza?" asked the waitress. We looked at each other, thinking it so strange that we hadn't even discussed our order with one another before our cute, blonde waitress had arrived. Well, of course we should share one pizza...

Of course, we decided to share a thin-crust mushroom pizza, since it would save us money and time. But this little story got me thinking about families. When we are with our families around the dinner table, in the SUV, visiting Grandma¡¦s house, we often make presumptions about each others¡¦ roles, just as my friends and I had done with our orders at Oreganos Restaurant. Of course, there were hardly any consequences for Natalie, Billy, Jeff and I - if we hadn't communicated our shift in preference, our change in appetites, we would have been stuck with a larger bill and less food... but the metaphor still applies...

When families get together, we must take notice and honor our loved ones changes. It's easy for us to become comfortable with predictable relationship patters, assigned behaviors, or labels. Some of these might include scheduler, comedian, bread-winner, deviant child, super-star, or lazy bum. When we sit down with our family, when we interact over the dining room table of life, we must do our best to put roles aside to Brother, Sister, Mom, and Dad can move in and out of different positions depending on their emotional needs. Sometimes, Mr. Comedy will want to take a break from creating comic relief in the midst of stressful situations. Allow him to order a Lazy Bum Sandwich once in a while. Sometimes Miss Scheduler will want to order a nice piece of Bread Winner Pie by picking up a temporary job for self-exploration.

When our family systems are too rigid, and inflexible, people often feel trapped in their roles, and don¡¦t feel free to get their full range of emotional desires met due to people pleasing. It might look something like this: "Oh, I shouldn't order mushroom pizza because Billy usually eats the croutons in my Cesar salad... and what will Jeff do with all that extra chicken in his calzone? I usually add it to my lettuce... Uh oh. I shouldn't order mushroom pizza. I should just do what people expect of me to keep the system happy".

When we have the courage to change, despite the approval of others, we give others the permission to engage in change as well. When we have the ability to see where we are depending on other people¡¦s habits, we suddenly forgive them for making changes that are good for them, because we see that what has inconvenienced us is not to be taken personally.

Whoa! The past two months are one big, gigantic BLUUUUUR. Fortunately and unfortunately going to school, working (two jobs) and raising three growing daughters can be a bit hectic and overwhelming at times. The everyday comings and goings of maintaining a household are enough to keep a girl busy. Then you add, end of school chaos, such as, award ceremonies, end of year performances, field trips, exams, finals, teacher appreciation gifts and projects, parties, etc and you begin to spin faster on the carousel of life.
Now, in the midst of this chaos comes a different kind of challenge, an unexpected move, and a move from a home that you have made comfortable for the past two years. This involves A LOT of weeding out, packing up and physically moving, ewwww. Yet, the carousel spins even faster.
Well, needless to say the past two months have had their fair share of activities. Physically, emotionally, financially and mentally exhausting yet so very rewarding because without a little struggle and weary long, dog tiring days I would never know what it feels like to truly appreciate the art of relaxing!
AHHHHHHH, my last weekend was such a beautiful and magical journey of sweet, simple moments that make any hardship so super worth it all. Alongside great company, I got to enjoy a night of no driving ƒº (gotta love public transportation!) down to first Fridays, in downtown Phoenix. What a chill evening, music, food, creative, colorful people, street dancers¡KFUN! Next, Saturday a lazy day that ended at an afternoon movie (without kids!?!?!?!?!) I couldn¡¦t remember the last time I saw an adult movie, with ADULTS¡Kpeople watching at Tempe Marketplace, dinner at the food court!?!?!? The only ¡§out to eat ¡§I do is sit down restaurants, never grab and go in mall food courts. So peaceful and leisurely I had to pinch myself. We finished that evening playing a million games of spades and apples to apples. FUN! Last but not least, another lazy morning that included grocery shopping and finished with cutting fruit for a fruit salad that would be a lovely addition to the carne meat we¡¦d be bbqing at the pool. It was a beautiful day in the pool and sun with my beautiful daughters and really great friends. FUN! Conversation, fun, food, sun and simple moments, all make for just a lovely, lovely weekend!!!
The moral to my story is, no matter how hard things may seem at the time, stay focused, and hold on to the knowing that in time ¡§this too shall pass¡¨ and you will always be rewarded for your effort. Just don¡¦t be so busy complaining and/or groaning that you can¡¦t hear or see it.
Blessed be,
Jodi