The greatest way to be inspired is by inspiring others. Time after time I can not tell you about the importance in helping others no matter where it is at. Ever since i got into recovery my life has been a major turnaround all because I became willing to accept some help. An old man with great wisdom by the name of Murphy came up to me one day and said "Justin, you don't ever have to drink or use drugs again. You can change the way you think right here right now, and your life can be beautiful with brightness rather that darkness and despair." In that moment a seed of hope split wide open deep in the depths of my soul." I knew it was the Truth. When I looked up into his eyes they shined with a light. Something had happened. What truly was it? I don't fully know. But one thing I do know is that I was inspired.

Ever since that moment I have been clean and sober for several years. What a joy, and what a challenge it has been too. Now I know they say "Change doesn't happen overnight, and actions speak louder than words." But honestly, the beginning of change can take place in a moment. After all miracles happen in moments right.

That man also said " the way you repay me is by passing it along helping others in need." This made sense to me. And so I tried, and so I did. Over these years of good living I have developed a sense of freedom and Love I can't even explain. Let me rephrase that "Over these past years of good living WE have developed a sense of freedom and Love WE cant even explain." If it weren't for all the people in my life I would definitely not be where I am today. Because of you I get to be me. The true me and the real me of who I always really wanted to be. So thank you for inspiring me. Especially you Murphy.

At 30 days into my recovery Murph told me to "go home and just write something" he added "just write anything you want, anything at all". So I did with much excitement. When I wrote this poem that night, it was as though the pen wrote itself. No thinking, no pondering, just the words falling freely. So here is a poem that will hopefully inspire you all.

The life of sobriety was meant for me
where i see before in the past drugs and alcohol
only drifted me further out to sea

not only that when I first caste my little ship
I was such a dipstick, I forgot the anchor
the bank slowly but surely faded away
and at first I say the five year float was one heck of a joke

however the laugh only lasted so long
now things eventually began to go totally wrong

i was lost living a lie
then one night i began to cry
why me, o why me

the self pity brought upon one enormous storm
the clouds collided and the waves raged
on this old rough rugged worn out little ship

i then became very, very sick
so i puked that night away with one huge headache

as the sun began to rise the next day
I began to pray for a change in my everyday lifestyle

by the Grace of God he was there within one second
as he carried me back to land
and laid me upon the soft shimmering sand
as my eyes opened wide,
his hands raised pointing towards the sun
clearly now i could see
The life of drugs and alcohol is just not for me

Justin

Hey all,
This past week has been very exciting. I started it off by being allowed to speak at Brophy College Prepatory. Brophy has a beautiful campus. I was expecting to be be nice looking but I was still surprised. I really liked their library and their new cafeteria. The ceiling was really cool looking in there. I was really glad to speak there for personal reasons. Then on Tuesday I got to got to Sunrise middle school. It was the second time I have spoken there. They have a really nice Liberian. I can tell she really cares about the students. I also know I would not want to get caught chewing gum in that library also!
I just finished answering some email from a school in Gilbert that I spoke at a few weeks ago. Several of the emails had the same question. They were wondering if I wish I had never drank alcohol. This is a tough question to answer. In one sense, of course I wish I had never drank alcohol. If I could have avoided all the stuff I went through and still have the great life I have today, without a doubt. But, there is no way of knowing that I would have this same great life I have today if I had never drank. So in that respect, no. I am grateful for the life I have today and if that meant I had to go through every single one of those “bad moments” to get where I am at today, then so be it. And I do not regret a single sip of alcohol that I drank. You see, it all led to where I am at today. A similar question that was asked was if I wish I had not started drinking so young. As strange as it may sound, I am very happy that I started drinking so young. If I had not, I may not of gotten help until much later in my life. Things got bad with me with my drinking very quickly. Believe it or not I consider myself lucky! It could have been much worse for me if my life was miserable because of drinking and it dragged on for a very long time. Luckily for me things got real bad real quick and I knew I had to quit drinking or I was going to end up in prison, or dead in a car crash from drunk driving. That is what it took for me to quit drinking. I had to become convinced I was going to end up in prison or dead from alcohol. This of course happened after I had already lost friends, family, been arrested, hurt my family, been in fights, lost girls, and crashed cars. If any one of these things did not happen, maybe I would have continued to drink. There is no way for me to say. But I’m glad I did quit, and I am glad I did do all those bad things.

What up everyone! Things are definitely starting to pick up here at the office. Had a pretty busy week last week and it is looking to be even busier this week. Last week I went and spoke at San Tan Elementary School. They were a pretty good group. I spoke on bullying and then Rachel did her “Rachel thing”. If you know Rachel, then you know what I’m talking about. If not, then you’ll just have to wait to meet her. She is just too wonderfully hard to describe. Anyhow, San Tan had a bunch of interesting questions for me that I am so glad they asked. Oddly enough, I also thought they had a pretty cool principal. Usually I don’t like principals. They kinda give me the heebie-jeebies, just because I used to always be in trouble.
Later that day I got to go see Justin do his first presentation at Vista Verde Middle School. Oh man, he was so happy to be doing it. He was a little scared of course too, but he was really glad that he had this opportunity to go speak and share his story with others. Speaking of being scared, I was glad I got to see him. Justin used to work for Anasazi as a Trail Walker in their wilderness program. Anasazi is a wilderness program for teens that are having a difficult time with life. To be really brief, basically a teen spends about 42 days out in the wilderness with other teens and a Trail Walker (guide). This gives them time to kind of sort things out for themselves and learn a little bit about themselves and life away from their normal life. This past weekend, the Not My Kid coordinators went up to their wilderness program so see what it was all about for ourselves. I was a little scared cuz I did not know what to expect. I wasn’t sure if they were going to have beds for us or if they were just going to hand me knife and then tell me they would pick me back up in 2 days. Turns out I had a bed. But I was glad to be able to talk to Justin a little bit before I went. I think they got a good deal going over there at Anasazi.
Sometimes I can just get overwhelmed by fear, nervousness, anxiety, or worry. Instead of saying scared, I like to say concerned. It makes me sound like less of a wuss! I have the same feeling on the inside though. What I try to do in those moments is to try to get back to the reality of the situation. Usually I am blowing something completely out of proportion. An acronym I like is F.E.A.R, Forgetting Everything About Reality. It brings my expectations back within a normal range of what may or may not happen. At that point, I figure out what, if any action I can take, do that and then try to let it go. Once I have done everything I can, there is nothing left for me to do but wait. My worrying about it or getting or staying upset does me no good except make me feel lousy at that point. So I let it go. I will repeat, this is what I try to do. I am not always able to do this unfortunately, but I do strive for it.

Gentle Mountain Sage has spoken