I’m not what you would call “computer literate”. Or “technologically sound”, which is why I’ve been a coordinator for 3 months and haven’t blogged yet. Well, here I am, after much help and encouragement. I’m told to talk about life and the recent goings-on of my day to day. So here goes:
This weekend I lost my little brothers half boxer, half basset hound puppy. So maybe I’m not “responsible” either. The only problem with that is that at this very moment I am 17½ weeks pregnant, and feeling “irresponsible” and losing a dog is more traumatizing than it would be to someone at my current stage of life.
My family was heading out of town, so my husband and I thought we could have the opportunity to keep Jazzy company so she wouldn’t miss them so much. We brought her home, played with her, and took her to the park as often as possible. Well, when coming back in from one of these trips, the door was not shut tightly, so while we were showering she took off and never looked back. She’s a VERY social animal, so initially we KNEW she’d be at the park, greeting every human or four legged creature with a big slobbery kiss. But, to our horror, NO ONE had seen her but a little old woman who thought she saw her running down the street. I tried to stay calm, but immediately thought of my heartbroken little brother’s face when I told him the news, and instantly started to sob. I prayed over and over that someone nice and kind and honest would find her, whether we were able to or not. And then I kept sobbing.
An hour and a half later (the longest hour and a half of my LIFE), my husband drove up with Jazzy’s head (and mostly tongue) hanging out the passenger side window. I cried some more. I said a prayer of thanks.
I’m so grateful for honest and kind and nice people. And I’m grateful my brother came home and had his best friend to greet him when he walked in the door.
For the next hour, I panicked to my husband. “WHAT IF WE DON’T SHUT THE DOOR AND OUR BABY CRAWLS OUT?!” We’re installing bolt locks and automatic doors as soon as finances permit.

This weekend, I went to Flagstaff with my great friend Natalie. She met me at my house; we jumped in my car, threw the dog and our clothes in the back seat, and took off to the nearest gas station to fill up on fuel (fuel for the car and fuel for us…that means caffeine and protein bars). In less than two hours and thirty minutes, we arrived to our destination – a log cabin nudged back in the woods. The air smelled like pine.

That evening, after unpacking our things, we went on a long walk through the trails of the forest, collecting pine cones and tossing them for the dog to chase throughout our journey. It was nice being away from noise…the noise of cell phones, of traffic, or television, and car radios. It was nice to listen to all of that quiet, and hear what God made – nature in the raw. The only things my ears could catch hold of were the crunching of pine needles under our feet, the rustling of the wind through the tree branches, and the occasional chirp of a few birds…but mostly, it was quiet.

I think I need a little more quiet in my life. I drive without the car radio on. I prefer listen to the sound of the air zip through my window. I don’t even have television. That’s right! I don’t even get basic cable…it’s just too much noise for me. And the longer I’m alive, the more I live and learn and love reality for what it is, the less I feel as though I need to lose myself in the sounds of ruckus to make my days feel more exciting than yesterday’s…

Sometimes, the best days are the days that are full of free space, free time, and quiet.

-Rachel Curry, July 2009

I asked my co-workers what I should write about, and someone yelled out "Pizza!" So here I am, unsure what exactly it is I should be blogging to my friends out there in the real world, talking about pizza.

My favorite kind of pizza is definitely mushroom thin-crust pizza, even though I hardly ever treat myself to such splendid Italian cuisine. Not too long ago, my friends Billy, Natalie, Jeff and I went to Oreganos Restaurant to eat out and talk about relationships ¡V something we do on a weekly basis. We toss around all of our preconceived ideas about boys and girls, love and break-ups, values and families in today's society.

When the waitress came to our table, I expected everyone to order as they normally did. I suspected that Natalie would order a Meatball Sandwich, Jeff would order his Classic Calzone, and Billy would order a thick-crust Hawaiian pizza. Usually, I indulge in a Cesar salad, but I ordered first, and asked for a slice of mushroom pizza. And then, so did Natalie...and so did Billy... and to our surprise, so did Jeff.

The waitress looked puzzled as she wrote down our order. ¡§Would you all just like to share one pizza?" asked the waitress. We looked at each other, thinking it so strange that we hadn't even discussed our order with one another before our cute, blonde waitress had arrived. Well, of course we should share one pizza...

Of course, we decided to share a thin-crust mushroom pizza, since it would save us money and time. But this little story got me thinking about families. When we are with our families around the dinner table, in the SUV, visiting Grandma¡¦s house, we often make presumptions about each others¡¦ roles, just as my friends and I had done with our orders at Oreganos Restaurant. Of course, there were hardly any consequences for Natalie, Billy, Jeff and I - if we hadn't communicated our shift in preference, our change in appetites, we would have been stuck with a larger bill and less food... but the metaphor still applies...

When families get together, we must take notice and honor our loved ones changes. It's easy for us to become comfortable with predictable relationship patters, assigned behaviors, or labels. Some of these might include scheduler, comedian, bread-winner, deviant child, super-star, or lazy bum. When we sit down with our family, when we interact over the dining room table of life, we must do our best to put roles aside to Brother, Sister, Mom, and Dad can move in and out of different positions depending on their emotional needs. Sometimes, Mr. Comedy will want to take a break from creating comic relief in the midst of stressful situations. Allow him to order a Lazy Bum Sandwich once in a while. Sometimes Miss Scheduler will want to order a nice piece of Bread Winner Pie by picking up a temporary job for self-exploration.

When our family systems are too rigid, and inflexible, people often feel trapped in their roles, and don¡¦t feel free to get their full range of emotional desires met due to people pleasing. It might look something like this: "Oh, I shouldn't order mushroom pizza because Billy usually eats the croutons in my Cesar salad... and what will Jeff do with all that extra chicken in his calzone? I usually add it to my lettuce... Uh oh. I shouldn't order mushroom pizza. I should just do what people expect of me to keep the system happy".

When we have the courage to change, despite the approval of others, we give others the permission to engage in change as well. When we have the ability to see where we are depending on other people¡¦s habits, we suddenly forgive them for making changes that are good for them, because we see that what has inconvenienced us is not to be taken personally.