So I decided to title this blog horse and carriage because I am actually making the conscious decision to NOT put the horse before the carriage with this new relationship I am in. I have not been in a relationship for almost a year, which I think is a good thing, however I also have not met anyone who was worth enough of my time and energy to commit myself to. The individual I am with now is strong, educated, financially intelligent, responsible, has never done drugs, has a son, is polite, compassionate, kind, respectful, and shares great communication with me. I have definitely put this individual on a pedestal, but for the first time in my 25 years of existence I am on the pedestal too. That has never happened before and it makes me happy, because it truly shows growth within myself and within how I view relationships with other people. I have been working on myself a lot lately and I have been progressively learning more and more about myself, both the cons and the pros. I am glad that I am in tune enough with myself to be able to notice these things. This is going to be a great year and my number one focus needs to be school, because I graduate in 3 months with my BA in Psychology with a minor in communication. School is definitely something that I have not gotten motivated in since my accident, which is so frustrating to me, because I love school and increasing my knowledge. I am currently on a mission to increase my desire to learn and achieve my most desired goals. Life has gotten easier, but it is never going to be easy all together. I still have so many struggles and it is obvious through all of my random blogs.

My final semester for my undergraduate degree is in progress and I am very excited about this semester. I have worked so very hard for the past 3.5 years and now I have the chance to enjoy being in college a little bit. I am a full time student, however this semester I am taking some relaxed classes and I will have more time to focus on healing and not stressing myself out. I also just started back up at my other job, but I have requested to not work weekends at all. This is giving me the opportunity to have two days to relax, study, and just be a normal college student. I want to enjoy my college experience as much as possible while I am still a kid…so to speak. I know that I only have one life to live, so I want to live it to the fullest. Every day is a new day for me and I am taking full advantage of that knowledge today. I am seeking out my zest for life again and it will be found. I have so many opportunities in front of me right now and I want to take advantage of as many of them as possible and to the best of my ability. I also know what my purpose is in life more today than I ever have before. My purpose is to help people in any and every way I possibly can. I have the opportunity to help people who are seeking out their majors in school, trying to figure out what graduate school to attend, figuring out how to study correctly, wondering if they should or should not do an internship, learning who professors are and what their focus is, and so much more. I also hope to soon have the opportunity to help the speakers who work for notMYkid have their goals met in any way I possibly can. It is wonderful to be able to experience life to the fullest degree and be one of the few survivors who actually make it into recovery and make a difference. Not everyone makes it out of addiction alive and/or with any chance at a normal life, but I did and I am going to take full advantage of it.

So last week I wrote a short blog explaining that I was run over by a truck. I also stated that I would keep everyone posted on my status with my leg and life as the time went by. Currently I am in a lot of pain and I personally feel that I am handling it very well. I have a lot of spasms, which are not fun and there is nothing that really helps subside them. In case anyone was wondering, no I am not consistently taking heavy medication. I have medication, but I only take it as needed. The rest of the time I take Tylenol for pain. My grades have dropped significantly due to this accident and I have been having issues with my memory, not to mention the anxiety I suffer, especially while in a vehicle. Other than that, I would like to note how absolutely grateful I am for the ability to walk and having my life. I started physical therapy this week and it is going well. It is not as painful as many people assume it is, but it is challenging. I also feel as if it is not just physical therapy, but mental therapy because I really have to focus on my coordination and to keep my hurt leg flat on the ground when I walk so that I can rebuild the muscle in it. Yesterday before one of my final projects everyone in the class stated what their best non-commercial present was. That means the best gift they were given that was not just purchased at a store. There were three of us out of about 40 who were grateful for the ability to walk, because we all had suffered severe traumas or accidents to our legs. There were also people who stated special items that were given to them by siblings, coworkers, family members, and friends. I had a few of the notMYkid staff share some of their experiences and it was a wonderful opportunity to be grateful for what we truly have in life and about all of the special times we have. I challenge each and every one of the individuals who read this to write down at least one thing you are truly grateful for and it can’t be materialistic. I mean try your very hardest to think about the best gift or blessing you have been granted in your life. It is pretty amazing what people come up with.
Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!!!